Journey 29
I send Mayen a short, terse email:
Wednesday 3rd October 02.24 am
MTCN number 5822119649 sent 2/10/07 15:24 PM
Wish your nanay the best fortune from timmyboy.
And I wish you good fortune as well.
God be with you.
I get the following reply from Mayen:
timmyboy,
thank you so much.. i have to go to province as soon as possible..
i will sms you as soon as i arrive in province.. im very very sad coz of what had happened.
but i always pray to be stronger. timmyboy please dont forget to pray for my mother..
i love you so much and please dont forget me.. i'll be back as soon as i figure this out..
mwwwaaaahhhhhh......
love,
mayen
She obviously hasn't visited the Western Union office yet then - if she had, she would have already found out that I made up the MTCN number.
In the meanwhile, I had been preparing a short video clip to send to Sir Francis which I despatched to them by email Wednesday 3rd October at 2.32 am.
The email I sent Sir F - 3rd October 03.32am (UK time)
The short movie - entitled "Trailer - Scary Movie - Final Cut" consisted of repeat frames of Mayen, wiping her brow - perspiring in front of the webcam - taken from the video I recorded of her revealing the scar. Then - a thought bubble appears with an engagement ring - cut to a picture of her navel, then a blurred still of the scar (I don't want them to know exactly how damning the evidence is that we have) then the same frame, superimposed with a detective's magnifying glass - Pink Panther style - with the word FAKE written across the lense in big red letters - all to the tune of "I've Got A Little List" from the Mikado. Yes - I have quite a long list - of email addresses to send the whole story to - but that can wait a while.[Important edit - 8th October 2012 - while trying to find an email by searching "October" in my email account - something has just turned up that I thought I'd lost all trace of.
Some evidence from this date - 3rd October 2007. Fortunately still there because I had forwarded the conversation to another friend.
My first, urgent communication to MySpace - about my account being hacked - precisely 1 hour after I had finished updating the blog on all of the latest news, & then decided to make it public.
.
One very powerful reason for my publishing all future extracts far-&-wide, when I eventually got re-established with another blog-site here - to prevent the impact of similar sabotage again.
Now - very few people, only some friends on MySpace, a few close friends of mine - & the real estate firm - knew of this blog's existence.With all the activity following, by the time I was up and running again - I'd omitted to write about the details of the hacking - before today.]
My plea to MySpace - 3rd October.
& their response - 7th October.
I sent Marivien a poem to give to Mayen - just so they are all aware of what's going on:
Ah, my chameleon love,
Your blackest art,
Changing hue,
To steal a heart,
Any colour will do,
Chameleon eyes
Watch the sky
Staring at clouds,
Never the sun,
Your darting tongue,
Sticky with lies,
As one by one
Your victims pass by.
With twisted tale,
There you cling
To your branch
Of reality,
Just for your gain,
The misery
And pain you bring.
Beware up there
In your sheltered tree,
Take care - though now
You feel so very tall,
Soon will crash down,
Chameleon and all.
If events unfold as we think they might - and if we were correct, Mayen might even have been striking out on her own to try to get the Western Union money - cutting Sir Francis out of the deal. (Why had she insisted that I didn't tell him about the engagement ring at the Barrio Fiesta in Hounslow - had she wanted to sell it and keep all the proceeds for herself? Although this wasn't taken any further and I didn't deliver a ring to Sir Francis - it struck me as odd.) Whether a solo or a concerted effort, the performance on the webcam was flawed - and in the process gave the whole game away by showing us a fake scar - exposing everything and everyone connected - the hospital, the operation, the Ectopic Pregnancy as a big fraud. Incriminating herself, her colleagues, Sir Francis and some staff in the hospital into the bargain - poor Mayen - or maybe her training prepares her for this sort of eventuality. Oh dear - we think that she could be rather worried - to say the least.
The next email I get from Mayen, for the first time since the "Four Feathers" - is from a different IP address - no doubt on her way back from the Western Union office.
Surprise, surprise - instead of being mad at me, Mayen is incredibly polite, apologetic even - no doubt on strict instructions from Sir Francis not to upset me - for fear of what I might do next.
Well - polite and apologetic to begin with - but observe the manipulation towards the end of the week - keeping up the act beautifully.
No - it's not her that's telling lies - having just tried to get hold of more money - continuing this travesty about her own mother - no - she twists it so that emotionally I accept the blame - for being poisoned again. Render me quickly senseless by a concussion of guilt and shame. It is this psychology that just about sums up this whole despicable charade.
Anyone capable of emails like this and the acting witnessed over the webcam - is capable of anything.
It all comes across the same - the dance of love - she plays the emotions like a masterful puppeteer - it's impossible to distinguish truth from fiction . . . at first.
Wednesday 3rd October.
timmyboy,
hope you are fine today.. i think i can fly today for province
the mtcn you sent me has no match.. it think you have write the wrong one..
im waiting for your sms.. im online as soon as you sms me..
is your computer okay now? are you busy today?
hope you have a rest last night..
Me still worried.. but this is not your problem, this is my..
i am ashamed to you really because of this trouble..
i hope you understand me Timmyboy... but i never let this happen..
maybe the fate is not on my side ..but s till hope i can figure this out..
i hope also, you wont think bad things against me..
please dont forget me and i love you so..
be safe always..
love,
mayen
The following emails received, despite being on the road to Sogod - are from the same IP address as all previous correspondence, since "coming out of hospital."
I am determined not to break the silence - I do not reply to anything.
Thursday 4th October
Dearest Timothy,
Have you recieved my sms yesterday? im here now in Samar leyte stop over..i ride bus yesterday all the way here.. i have found intercafe in here.. so i have 15 minutes to write you before the bus going to tacloban then going to Sogod.. What a long journey sweetheart.. Last night i thought we were stranded in Bicol because its dangerous to across the sea.. the bus must be in the ferry to cross from MATNOG TO ALLEN Leyte.. thank God we are safe... Feel so tired and i look hagard in my hair huhuhu.. big waves in the ocean..
I decided to go directly to SOGOD hospital, i foned father today and he told me mother is waiting for me and she's a little bit okay now..but her blood pressure is always monitored because its not stable.. im glad to hear about for some development for my nanay...I will tell my mum about us.. that we are now together again and you ask apology for what had happened before..I told also my father about us.. and he understand and say regards to you as well.. At last im at ease now..
I love you so much my timmyboy.. and please dont forget me.. Im thinking of you too often. I hope you are safe always.. and please pray for mum's recovery.. I will write again as soon as i arrive in sogod im sure there are internet cafe in their and we can still communicate each other.. Mwwaaahhhhhh.
hope your computer is okay.. and please leave me message..have to go now because bus will start to go hehehe they might leave me huhuhu.. love you mwwaaahh..
missing you so,
Thursday 4th October
Dearest timmyboy,
i just arrived here now in SOGOD leyte.. im too tired, i found internet cafe near
the hospital.. im here now, i thought you leave mail for me but still nothing.. what happened?
im worried about you Timmyboy.. why you never write me since october 2?are you busy? or are you angry with me? please tell me..
im thinking about you, im used to have your mail everyday..im wondering why i dont have mail from you.. please tell me why? i called your celfone but its close.. tell me what's happening.. please dont make me worry.. please sms me.. please..
i love you so and please dont forget me.. i'll be here tomorrow morning..
mwwaaahhhhhh..hope to chat you.. please sms me timothy..
love,
mayen
Friday 5th October
timmyboy,
im thinking what you are doing right now.. im thinking what you are thinking?
what happened? you just dis appear since october 2.. are you angry with me?
you know what im thinking that you are angry with me, because i told you what happened about my mother and im suspecting you that you are thinking bad against me just like before.. timmy, telling you about the situation of my mother
doenst mean anything.. i just want to share my pains and my worries that i felt right now.. if only you are here with me.. you can see what i'd been through..i never ask you money.. it was just you who open it and voluntered about the WU.
but its okay, i never claim your money coz its a wrong mtcn..i dont know what happened to you.. i just need your comfort not money..and if you are thinking like that then its up to you.. as i have said.. i cant change your suspiscious mind..
its just you...and its your nature...im so sorry if i think like this.. maybe i am too sensitive right now.. im just wondering why you disappear after that long talk last oct 2..and im worried.. cant contact you, evertyhing is off.. no computer no celfone.. no e mail no sms.. i dont know where are you..
i miss you so much and i love you still.. please tell me where are you..
and what happened to you..and please dont think bad things against me..
now all have to do is to take care my mama and maybe this next week, i'll be back in manila.. coz she's alittle bit fine now.. i thank God for everything..
missing you,
mayen
Saturday 6th October
TIMMYBOY,
uNTIL this time im wondering whats going on with you?
i dont know why you disappear.. you tell me if your angry with
me and what did i do wrong to you? why you are gone?
i dont know...
timmyboy, i love you so and i really do..
please believe me.. and if this is a sign of goodbye
then i have nothing to do.. but to respect your decision..
i hope, we can still talk and clear this up.. it really hurts
for me why you just simply disappear..
i love you still and im waiting for you..
missing you,
mayen
Sunday 7th October
dearest timothy,
tell me whats going on with you.. until this time im wondering why?
i know you are poisoned again, coz i remember the last time you sms
me you told me you will visit to a friend.. i know i know i know
you are now poisoned again.. why you let this happen to us..
im am surprised by your actuations right now.. you told me, you wont hurt me again..
but still you do again and again..
If you misinterpret our last chat last october 2, i remember our last chat..
and if thats the reason why you change.. no you are wrong.. im just sharing my
pains and my worries.. i never ever mean anything.. i never told you to send money..
it was you who offered about the WU, remember? i supposed not to tell you about what happened to my nanay because im afraid you will misinterpret it.. coz i know you are sensitive.. and now, im not mistaken.. i know thats the reason why you act like this..
but to tell you honestly, i just need your comfort and i want you to pains and worries.
you were the one who told me, to share it to you.. to half the wories i felt..now nanay is a bit fine now she will be release this tuesday.. and by thursday i'll be back to manila..
timothy, if you are like that then this is an immature act.. i never thought you are like this..
you did it again.. you hurt me..you words are not true.. the are not real..
but again, i have to tell you.. i love you still.. i can never for get you coz you are a part me..
i really dont know you keep on doing this to me..what did i do wrong?
sometimes i ask God why i met you.. why you came into my life and you just contribute pain in my heart..why you cant love me in return when He knows how much i love you?
why you are hard to reach? why i love you inspite of what you did to me?
Towards the end of the week I had been getting phone calls as well from Mayen, which I had been ignoring - my mind was made up now - she was not the girl of my dreams - despite lingering emotions - the time had come to assuredly make a stand for what was now 99.9% obvious to me - it was already 100% obvious to everybody else who heard of what was happening - but I'm a slow learner.
On the Saturday while at work having a break between my shows, with the rest of the orchestra in a Pizza restaurant, I was telling my fellow musicians about the story.
I get a phone call from my niece - she had heard about it all as well from her mum (my sister) - and felt very concerned for me - she had told Nellie, a Filipina friend of hers of my tale of woes.
Nellie was very keen to chat to me about it - she had spent half her life in the Philippines and then got married to an Englishman and settled over here in the UK. My niece passed on Nellie's details and I promised to phone Nellie as soon as I got home - about 11'o'clock at night.
So on my return home I phoned Nellie - she told me what a dangerous place the Philippines could be - she's going to send me a book written by a woman whose son was murdered shortly after he married and emigrated there.
Nellie voiced disgust at her fellow countrymen who put the Philippines to shame by their behaviour - the Philippines is rapidly becoming a byword for scam - she told me that Mayen was probably the family bread winner - at first she thought that Mayen might have had some genuine feelings for me - she said it is quite possible for her to have been pressured into this by her family or even the hospital - but changed her mind when I filled in the details - the treatment from Mayen's family - how Mayen had initiated our physical relationship "No good Filipina would do that!" Nellie exclaimed - and admitted to me that there are professionals, teams of scammers - working the dating sites - just as we suspected. Nellie was pleased that I seemed to be approaching it sensibly and treating it all with due suspicion and caution.
My niece phoned up shortly afterwards to ask how the chat with Nellie had gone. My phone battery ran out during the call, so I put my phone on charge - 1.03 am - soon it was ringing again - my niece again I thought.
Without paying attention to the number I answered the call - I knew exactly where it was from the moment I heard the cockerels - crowing in the background - dawn was breaking in the Philippines.
Mayen's brother said "Hello? Tim? . . ."
. . . and then Mayen herself came on the phone. She asked me where I had been the last five days - why no contact - could I phone her back? No, I certainly couldn't - far too expensive. I suggested we meet online for a chat - but privately decided I would not be there. It was early in the morning Mayen said, but she would meet me later on.
My niece then telephones again - I am slightly shell-shocked - the sound of Mayen's voice - it just does things to me - although she didn't sound her usual bubbly self - she sounded rather intense - as if she had something on her mind.
I told my niece of my plan to not be anywhere near the chat - I was going to be strong - keep the silence going.
2.54 am - my Yahoo Messenger informs me that Mayen has come online.
I can see now - that it is my desire that she is toying with - hence why the webcam works so well in her favour.
We have been talking at home about how easy it is for actors to get people to believe in them - despite their full knowledge that it is play acting - the audience suspend their disbelief.
How much easier is it for a person - operating in the arena of "reality" - to achieve the same thing - I can quite easily suspend my belief that Mayen is up to no good when chatting to her - cam to cam - because at those times my desire is peaking - I see her - I covet her - I willingly suspend the disbelief of her sincere love for me.
She acts like a drug - that gradually wears off - and then the unquestionable string of inconsistencies starts to come into focus again.
The more I expose myself to that drug, the more it will start to remain in my system - gradually bridging the gaps between doses - the spaces that allow alternative explanations to suggest themselves to me - that is potentially dangerous for me to start floating away again on a fluffy cloud of intoxication.
Remember that the drug itself was distilled in my very own pharmacy - my own choice ingredients - my fantasy concoction - it has next to nothing to do with the reality of Mayen - she is simply so adept at being the chameleon.
It is merely that her photograph, her face was where I allowed the phantom-like vapours rising from the crucible of my heart, to condense.
I christened my own phantom - in her name.
My true knowledge of her from the trip whispers to me - and it doesn't really correspond to the hallucination in any real sense at all - I wouldn't ever dare to say that Mayen loves me - not from hearing those whispers.
It really beggars belief - how damn good she is at this - as I said before - the contrasting interpretations expand either side towards heaven in one direction - and hell in the other.
I stare at her yellow smiley for a short while - she starts to send me messages - aw! what the heck - what can I lose by having a chat? - I can be strong - I know the truth now - so I reply - the session is under way - and what a session it turned out to be - I have lots of video recorded from Mayen's webcam.
Now Mayen has not mentioned the video I sent Sir Francis in any of her recent emails - still continuing the deception that she is not in contact with Sir Francis or the old gang - nor has she really seemed that concerned about the Western Union money being snatched from her grasp - just when she must have been convinced that she'd made another kill.
Click the flags to read about all the alarm bells.
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